A Letter for My One-Year-Old

My Sweet Boy,

A year ago today I woke up after a night of restless sleep...partly from being nine months pregnant and uncomfortable, but mostly because I knew I would be meeting you the next day. We left for the hospital early, and had a wonderful day (although a little uncomfortable for me) waiting for you to arrive. After only 6 hours of labor, you entered our lives and changed us forever.

From the second we brought you home from the hospital, you have been a perfect and integral part of our family. We did not even know that we were missing you until you came along and showed that to us with every smile, laugh, coo, giggle, and cry. I can still remember the feeling of newborn you, no bigger than a football, cuddling up on my shoulder after nursing in the middle of the night. I told myself to never forget those moments...to impress them on my heart and my memory forever...and I hope that I never, ever do. I can't tell you the number of times I would come in the living room to find you sleeping on top of your dad, or the time I came back to the car after running into the store for a few items and finding your sweet dad in the backseat with you out of your carseat and cuddled to his chest because he couldn't stand to hear you starting to fuss. Those first few weeks and months were hard, but so very precious.

As you've grown your personality has developed right before our eyes, and though we can see ourselves in you, you are definitely your own little person. You are silly, funny, active, extremely curious, and sometimes straight up crazy! We are either laughing at you, keeping you out of trouble and from hurting yourself, or staring at you in shock after you do something we can't believe. Jackson, you definitely keep us on our toes. You are friendly to everyone you meet, and you quickly remember and recognize people that we spend a lot of time with. You have so many family members that love you and can't wait to visit and play with you. Your grandparents love you infinitely, and you have aunts and uncles, cousins, and friends who are like family who also love you and would do anything for you. You are so blessed. Do not ever forget or take for granted how blessed you are, my son. I know we will never forget how blessed we are to have you in our lives.

I can't wait to watch you grow up and start playing with your many cousins and friends. I pray that you will be close with them all, and that you will all have a common bond in the Lord Jesus. You will have a lot of friends here where we live. When your dad first proposed to me, I could not even imagine what my life would be like living at Turkey Hill year-round. The life that we live here is very different from others, but I have grown to be so very, very thankful for its uniqueness. The Lord knew what He was doing (He always does!) when He placed us here...and now we can see that as long as we are here, you will grow up with other little boys, two that are very close to your age, and surrounded by people who love you like their own. It warms by heart to see how sweetly and sincerely others love and care for you. 

Jackson Edmond, more than anything, your dad and I pray for your salvation each and every day. We know that the Lord loves you fiercely, and more than we ever could be capable of, even though it seems impossible that anyone could love you more than we do. As perfect as you are in our eyes, we do know because of God's Word that you need a Savior, and we pray that you will trust in Jesus Christ to be that Savior for you. I want to leave you with a few more things. Things that I pray for for you, and things that your father and I strive to live out in our lives before you. 

Always, always follow God's Word. (Psalm 119:105)

Look to Him for all your decisions and choices in life. (Proverbs 3:5,6)

Trust that He has your very best interests in mind. (Jeremiah 29:11-13)

Put the Lord first in your heart. (Mark 12:30)

I don't know when or if you will ever read these things, but I hope that my actions always show you how much I love you and how much you mean to me. You have completely changed me and opened my heart up to a selfless, sometimes almost painful love. Painful in that my heart is so attached to yours that anything that ever hurts you, hurts me. I am constantly worrying about you, and recommitting you and your life into the hands of the Lord. In His hands is the safest, best place for you to be. I pray that I always have the strength to give your life to Him, just as Hannah gave Samuel to the Lord. Your dad feels the exact same way, and we will always, always love you and care for you. 

Thank you for an amazing first year...I can't wait to watch you grow and learn even more as the years pass by. I am thankful for every second, every breath, and every day that we have with you, sweet baby.

Happy First Birthday.

Love, 

Mama

Happy 10 Month Birthday, Jackson!

Happy 10 Month Birthday, Jackson!

Sorry to be so late in writing this...in just a few days you will actually be 11 months old! When people have been asking me how old you are recently, I have been replying, "He'll be one next month on July 24." Um, whoa. That's crazy, baby boy. 

Weight: 21 pounds or so

Height: No clue!

Diapers: Size 3, but they are getting pretty tight!

Clothes: 6-12 in shorts, 12 months in onesies, some 9-12, and some 12-18 months in rompers

This month it was so hard to get you to sit still at all for your 10 month photos. I tried two different times...and neither turned out well. I literally could not distract you or get you to stay in the chair for a second. All the pictures were blurry and one of the only clear ones has my hand holding you still in it. Sheesh. So that's why at this point there is only one picture of you for this month. I will have to see what I can salvage of the other ones, you busy boy! At first, I was very upset that your photos would be less than perfect, but this is who you are now at this stage. I will always remember you as an on-the-go baby who did not have the time to sit still for his mommy.

Speaking of which, I have never, ever been around a baby who moves as much as you do! You are a high-speed crawler and you go from toy to toy to toy all over the floor! You are constantly moving, rolling, pulling up, and cruising everywhere. One thing doesn't interest you for very long before you are on to the next...it's hard to keep up with you! You are so sweet though and love to be around your dad and I as well as other people. You are very friendly, and have only shied away from a few people. Most of the time you are happy to chat and go to anyone, and living in the place that we do at camp, your personality could not be anymore perfect!

You still have zero interest in walking and even when I try to hold you up by your hands to stand, you immediately want to sit down. I guess you are just too good of a crawler! You could surprise us all and suddenly take off one day because you are definitely strong enough, but for now, you are content on all fours. 

Sunday mornings at church are proving to be very difficult as of late. It is so hard for you to only sit on my lap or Daddy's lap and play with toys quietly. You understand the word "no" so well at home, so I knew you were ready to start learning to sit and not be on the floor playing in church, but wow it has been a hard lesson for you to learn. I spend most of my time outside with you because you throw the biggest fit when we won't let you go and play on the floor like you want to. I know this time is temporary, and I want you to know that we are only teaching you this lesson because we love you so very much. We want you to sit quietly during that time at church so that you can hear God's Word and learn about the love that He showed us through His Son, Jesus. I am going to start having a few minutes a day of quiet time at home with you so we can gradually work up to the length of time we sit in church on Sundays. You'll catch on soon, my sweet boy.

Jackson Edmond, you are truly a piece that completed our family. Having you has shown me a type of love that I never knew before. I was just telling your GiGi that the love I feel for you is the closest to knowing the way that God loves us. It is a selfless, infinite love that is unlike any other. Thank you for completing our family and showing me that love.

Happy Nine Month Birthday, Jackson!

Sweet Jackson, you are nine months old!

The weather is getting warmer and warmer, and plans for a full summer at camp are stirring in everyone's hearts. I can't help but remember this time last year you were still in my tummy, and I was also looking forward to the end of the school year and camp starting. With the warm weather I know that your first birthday is only three months away, and I am still surprised at how fast this first year has flown. I must admit that though I am sad that you are growing up, I am looking forward to starting the planning for your first birthday party!!! It's going to be so much fun!

Weight: 20 pounds 1 oz

Height: 29 inches

Diaper Size: 3 during the day, 4 overnight

Clothes: 6-12, 9, 9-12, and some 12 months

A funny story about your diapers...we started ordering them from Amazon about five months ago, and have been getting a great deal through Amazon Mom. They send us a box of diapers once every two months, and it has been so convenient to have them arrive right at our door. Well, up until now we've had to switch diaper sizes every couple of months because you grow so fast and have always been an adorable chubby baby. So I decided to plan ahead and order some size 4's for you a couple of months ago instead of the size 3's assuming you would be ready to fit into them during the day by now. Unfortunately when we put you into the size 4's you had TWO poopy blowouts in one day and the diapers hung down between your legs. I guess you weren't ready for those during the day just yet! So that night Daddy had to go to the store and buy you more size 3's. Whoops.

Another reason you probably weren't ready for bigger diapers is because you have really slimmed down! You've been speed crawling everywhere, pulling up and cruising along us and the furniture, so it isn't really a big surprise that your once obvious belly rolls have all but disappeared. Your thighs still have some chunk on them, but your waist and belly are skinny, boy! It's funny because pants that were tight on you a month ago are now loose around the waist. When we were at your 9-month well-child visit, the doctor showed us how your BMI had dropped significantly, but said that it was perfectly normal for an active, cruising baby.

And boy, are you active. You never, ever seem to stop moving. You are constantly moving all around the living room from one toy to another. You pull up to the window, crawl up and OVER baskets of toys, walk along the edge of the couch, and try to pull everything off my shelves. Because of that, my home decor has had to be put on hold for convenience for awhile. I've been recording videos of you playing because it is so cute and I want to make sure and remember it forever. Any chance you get you are trying to play with the remote, our phones, and the computer. You actually popped one of the keys off of the laptop this week {don't worry, Daddy fixed it!}, and you conked yourself in the head pulling the iPad off the couch. Even though you are a handful, we are enjoying this stage of your growth so much, Jax.

I think your dad is enjoying it especially, and I'm pretty sure he's your favorite person right now. As soon as you hear the door open of him coming in from work, you race over to the couch where I have you blocked in and stand up and whine for him to come get you. You are so excited when you see him and he picks you up that you grin and bury your face in his shoulder. I must admit I do get a tiny bit jealous, but my heart also melts to see my two boys having such a wonderful relationship. Your dad loves you so much, Jackson, and he would do anything for you...don't ever forget that!

You decided about three weeks ago that you were pretty much "over" baby foods, and you only wanted what we were eating. I knew this day was coming, and I feel like you seemed so much older as soon as we started giving you solid food. You love it and will eat almost anything we give to you. You've had so many new foods this month, and I'm actually having fun giving them to you! You like veggies that you would never eat pureed, so that's a plus, and you LOVE fruit. Your favorites are mandarin oranges and strawberries. You also figured out how to hold and suck food out of packets, and those are the only "baby foods" you still have tolerance for so we take those when we go out. Tonight you also enjoyed some Go-Go Squeeze applesauce and you held the packet up to your mouth with one hand and acted like you had been eating that way your whole life.

I have been working on a few baby signs with you, but you still don't really seem interested. We are also working on clapping and waving bye-bye. I wish I knew what was going on in your head when I am waving my hands and arms around in front of you trying to teach you. You must think I am so silly, and I hope you catch on soon so I won't feel so silly anymore! You still say "da-da" and "ma-ma," and you have also started saying "ba-ba" too. You really seem to be discovering your voice and love screeching and yelling at us from your crib and while you are playing with your toys.

I know the time left in your babyhood is short, but I feel like we are finally to the point where we are really enjoying each stage of your development. We love teaching {or trying} to teach you new skills, and when you do them, your dad and I get so excited. We still pray with you and for you every night, and we also pray for ourselves as your parents. We love you, Jackson Edmond, and are trusting in the Lord for your life, your salvation, and the wisdom to raise you into a man of God.

Easy Chicken Taquitos

I am always on the lookout for quick, easy recipes that I can whip up with things I have at home. You see, I've been saying that I am going to start meal-planning for` about a year now and I have never really gotten into the swing of that consistently {lame, I know}. A typical week for me involves make a quick list in my head and on my phone as we are driving in to Walmart for groceries. I know my system is flawed because I always forget something, or I will realize I didn't account for a night that we were going to be home and needed dinner. Thankfully for absentminded wives and mothers like me {who need to start meal planning!}, there are recipes like this that are yummy and simple to make. We liked these chicken taquitos so much in fact that my husband actually asked me when I was going to make them again...and that, my friends, is the sign of a successful dinner!

Ingredients:

3-4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts (or pre-cooked/grilled chicken strips if you are in a time crunch)

1/2 C of cheddar cheese

1/3 can of diced green chiles 

1-2 T Taco Seasoning

8" Flour Tortillas

Serving Size: 

About 7-8 Taquitos. This was perfect for just Matt and I with a couple left over for the next day. If you have more than 2 people in your family, I would double the recipe! Shredding the chicken rather than just cutting it up would also make the recipe go farther! 

1. Preheat oven to 350*

2. Start by opening the pre-cooked chicken strips and slicing them into smaller pieces. You don't want big wraps, but small skinny taquitos. I think it's important to share that when I made this the first time I cooked the chicken myself because I always have frozen chicken breasts on hand. I thawed the breasts, cut them into small strips, salted and peppered them, and cooked them in a little olive oil and butter in my skillet. I also added the taco seasoning while they were cooking. This time I had a package of pre-cooked chicken strips that were already seasoned, so I just used those and added the taco seasoning. After you've cut up the strips to a size of your liking, throw them in a bowl.

3. Toss in your taco seasoning (you can add more or less to your liking) and diced chiles. Make sure to drain your can of chiles first. I used about 1/3 of the can of chiles. You can certainly use the entire can but be prepared for a little more kick. :)

4. Add your cheese and mix it all together.

5. Lay out one of your tortillas on a plate or cutting board and scoop a spoonful of the chicken mixture on the tortilla. You will want to spread the mixture along the edge of the tortilla and not in the middle. I even went with the curve of the tortilla, and you will see why in a moment.

6. Begin to roll the tortilla starting on the edge with the chicken mixture. Roll the tortilla as tight as possible, but not so tight that you are going to tear the tortilla. I used flour tortillas instead of corn for this very reason, but if you only have corn tortillas on hand, just heat them up in a skillet before topping and rolling them and that should help their flexibility.

7. Lay the tortilla seam-side down in a well-greased 8x8" baking dish. You may also use a 9x13" if you are doubling this recipe. Then repeat steps 5-7 until you have filled the entire dish.

8. I then sprayed the tops of the taquitos with cooking spray as well so that they would crisp up nicely. The tortillas won't really brown in the oven (except around the edges), but you want the shells to feel crispy to the touch.

9. Bake for about 20-25 minutes. The taquitos are done when the cheese is melty and bubbly and the shells feel crispy.

10. Serve as an appetizer with salsa or with other Mexican sides as a meal. We loved ours with salsa, and I think next time I will make a corn casserole to go with it as well. Yum!

The only thing I will do differently when I make these again is to actually cook the chicken myself and then shred the chicken finely in my stand mixer. I think the texture of the shredded chicken would be amazing! I hope you enjoy these soon! 

Dear Jackson: Do Not Live Your Life In Fear

To my sweet baby boy,

As I sit here watching the news on television and viewing the devastating and terrible events of the last week in both Boston and Texas, my heart is hurting. The scenes and videos of this terror are difficult to watch, and it is impossible to look at them without a knot forming in the pit in my stomach. I can also recall this same feeling back in December when sweet, innocent children and adults were shot and killed in a school where they had come to learn. When I was in the sixth grade I also witnessed thousands of people die in a terrorist attack on America when planes crashed into the World Trade Center in New York City as well as the Pentagon and a field in Pennsylvania.  Unfortunately these types of events where people die and are killed in acts of evil are not new. As you grow up you will learn of many, many other events in not only America, but world history that paint a terrible view of the human race. 

I want you to know something...because you are going to hear many different things. You are going to be told that we must all live in uncertainty and fear because the world in which we live is a terrible, evil place. You are going to hear that we need to love these evil people. You are going to hear that we need to kill these evil people. You are going to hear that if the world would only love one another, then all hatred and evil would cease. Others will say, "I have lost all my faith in humanity." Oh, my dear son...before you listen and let your heart be moved...look to one place and one place only...

God's Word. The Bible. 

The Bible does teach us that the world is a very evil place. God says in the Bible that not only that there are evil people in the world, but that we are ALL actually sinners. {"For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23} Because of the free will that God gave to us, we do choose to act on our sin nature, and some individuals choose to do terrible things like you will witness here on earth. It can be a scary, scary thought. God did not intend the world to be this way, and when He created the world it was a perfect place with no hurt, sin, or evil. He created man to have fellowship and a relationship with him. Unfortunately because of our free will, man choose to disobey God and sin in the garden of Eden, and sin entered the world. I am reminded of this verse:

"Therefore, just as through one man sin entered the world, and death through sin, and thus death spread to all men, because all sinned." Romans 5:12

Does that mean that we should live our lives in fear? No. There is good news. There is comforting news. And it also comes from God's Word.

"These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world." John 16:33

Jesus assures us and reminds us that the world is a terrible place and full of tribulation, but that He has overcome the world. My dear, sweet son, I want you to remember that Jesus, God's Son, because He loved you, came and died on the cross where God placed all of our sins on Him. He paid the price for our sins, and your sins, so that He did overcome death and the sin of the world.

We do not have to live in fear. We do not have to wonder and be anxious over what our fate may be here on earth.

Jesus conquered all.

If you trust in Jesus Christ to save you from your sins because of what He did on the cross, you will be saved, and the troubles of this world are for naught. Yes, the world is a scary place full of people who destroy others' lives and happiness. Could we be injured or killed in this world because of people like this? Yes. But do not fear, Jackson. Live your life in peace because of Jesus and the eternity that we may spend with Him if we accept Him as our Savior.

A Lesson in Patience: Link-Up With The Mama Memoirs

Sorry for the blogging hiatus recently...I've been working on a few posts, but a few of them are a little more personal and on a more serious note, so I want to make sure that they are at their very best before I put them out on the world wide web. ;)

But because I miss posting, and because I found an awesome link-up with A Sorta Fairytale, I'm sharing today about something I have been struggling with as a mother.


Patience. As mothers I think we all realize that the instant you see the positive result on a pregnancy test that you can no longer put yourself or your own needs first. Throughout pregnancy you avoid certain foods, medications, and activities that could possibly harm your baby. Then when they are finally here and in your arms you sacrifice sleep, energy, and don't shower for days {or was that just me?!} so you can spend all your time caring for your sweet little newborn.

Looking back now, I think that even though I was so focused on putting Jackson's needs first and that I loved him so much, I still struggled with being patient with him. When I would just close my eyes and drift off to sleep only to hear him begin to fuss because he wanted to nurse for the third time in two hours. When he would cry so hard in the car that it sounded like he couldn't breathe. When he was so fussy that I couldn't sit in church and enjoy fellowship with other believers on Sunday. Wow. Even writing this now that he is almost 9 months old, I can't believe that I thought those instances were so trying on my patience.

Hard to believe you can be frustrated with this sweetness, huh?

Now I find myself really struggling when I'm trying to feed Jackson and he arches his back and pushes my hands and the spoon away. Or when he screams at the top of his lungs from his crib at 6:00 in the morning. He's also taken to just screaming and screeching in general, but it's the hardest to listen to when he wakes up at the aforementioned time and I am trying to doze on the couch while he plays. And my favorite...when he flips his entire body over while I am trying to wipe poop off of his rear end.

My attitude has not been the best when dealing with these situations lately...I allow myself to get frustrated and I struggle with not snapping at Jackson. I'm ashamed to admit that I have been losing sight of putting Jackson's needs first as I so carefully did when I was pregnant. The Lord entrusted me with the upbringing of these sweet boy and I have been missing out on so much joy when I choose to allow frustration to take hold. No matter how much I want to change and be more patient, I cannot do this on my own.

I need Jesus.

I need His grace and His perfect patience. When the disciples continually acted amazed at His power and miracles, or when Peter, James, and John fell asleep twice when He had asked them to wait up and pray with Him in the garden...He still patiently loved them, taught them, and led them. How much more so does He do that with me? I do not always obey, I do not always trust, and I do not always serve my Savior with my whole heart. And yet, the Lord is constantly patient and loving to me.

So now when Jackson wakes me up early or when he cries for my attention when I'd rather be reading blogs, I make sure to pray and ask the Lord to give me patience. Give me grace. Because here on earth I may be saved from my sins, but I am not a perfect being, and I need help having patience.

I love my son so very much, and I am ever so thankful for the opportunity that I have been given to learn this lesson. I have never thought about this before, but because of my role as a mother, the Lord is using that role to teach and mold me into a more perfect representation of His Son.

Oh, thank you, Lord Jesus, for your patience with me and for my sweet son who I am learning from every day.

Have you ever struggled with being patient?

*

"Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing." James 1:3 & 4

Happy Eight Month Birthday, Jackson!

My sweet baby Jackson,

Happy Eight Month Birthday! I have to wait until you go to bed to write this post because you are so active and busy that we have to chase you around all the time! You are curious, into everything, a super fast crawler, and you fall and bump your head numerous times each day…you are definitely all boy! Here are my guessing for your size this month:

Weight: 20 pounds or so

Height: 28 inches

Diaper Size: 3 during the day, 4 overnight

Clothes: 9 months and 6-12 months

You now have 6 teeth, four on top and two on the bottom. Over the last few days you have been trying to cut a third tooth on the bottom as well. I’m not certain, but I’m pretty sure you have more teeth than some 18 month olds! You look adorable when you smile, and we have also started brushing your teeth while in the bath at night.

 

This month you took off with crawling and can be on the other side of the room in a blink of an eye! You are so fast that we cannot turn our backs without a) having you caged in with pieces of furniture, b) strapping you into the high chair, or c) plopping you in the Jumperoo. If we by chance do not do those things and we look away from you, you immediately go one of two places: towards the stairs into the new dining room (thank goodness Daddy put up your gate a few days ago), or towards the step down into the new mudroom. Seems to me like you’re looking for trouble and trying to get yourself into accidents, my boy. As for me…I’m chugging Diet Pepsi and just trying to keep up with you!

Speaking of accidents…now that you can pull up on your own this month (yes, ALL BY YOURSELF!), you fall backwards or fall forward and bonk your head or face at least 10 times each day. Sometimes you cry and sometimes you just roll out and act like nothing happened. You pull up on everything: the activity table, the front of your walker, the couch, the ottoman, our legs…you name it. It’s funny watching you try to figure out how to sit back down once you’ve stood up, and is probably the source of most of your falls. I know you’ll figure it out on your own soon, but I still hate seeing you get hurt so much. I know that this is only the beginning…

You also have started eating quite a bit more soft table foods, and you have mastered the pincher grasp, so you put pieces in your mouth all by yourself. You’ve had macaroni, shredded cheese (your favorite), steamed carrots, steamed broccoli, and you inhale puffs and yogurt melts. I’ve started trying to teach you a few signs while your eating like “more” and “all done.” You mostly just look at me like, “Woman, quit waving your hands and just give me my food!”

Probably our favorite development this month is you actually saying  “Dada.” I really pushed for “Mama” first, but I was thrilled when you started rattling off “Dadadadada” all the time. It’s so cute and is definitely your favorite sound to make now that you’ve started saying it. We are trying to get you to realize that that word is actually a person, but you haven’t figured that out yet.

We are having so much fun watching you grow, Jax, and I know I say this to you all the time…but it is only because I mean it so much: We love you forever!